I'm wondering if allowing beads back into my world will take away from other things. I imagine so. How can it not? I guess I'll just have to find a new balance, because balance is not a thing we find once, that stays put. It takes constant adjustment, whether we're standing on one foot, walking a tight rope, riding a bike, dancing, or just getting through a regular day filled with Stuff To Do. A statue of a balancing Buddha has it all figured out, once and for all. It stands there, perfectly balanced, almost mocking, and yet encouraging, seeming to say, HA! You'll never do this, but please DO keep trying! We just have to wobble along, losing and regaining our own balance the best we can.
I have a silly habit of standing on one foot to put my socks on, rather than sitting down to do it. I don't have time for a yoga class, but Sock Yoga is really helpful. After doing this for years, I'm actually very steady on one foot, and then on the other. Not Buddha-steady, but still, pretty good for a mere mortal. Maybe it's helping with my inner balance too. After all, physical and inner balance are inseparable partners.
I feel fortunate that the beads that are "making themselves" these days are being very gentle with me. They know what to do, right down to staying round and balanced, even when there are five on a mandrel. There's no stress in making them, and if I start to feel any of the old resistance again, that will be a good clue that my own balance needs to be readjusted.
But making beads, cleaning beads, photographing beads, posting beads, selling beads, and mailing beads all take up a lot of time. I don't know yet how I'll also get the writing done, and the lunches and coffee dates with friends, and the walks around the neighborhood, and so many other things I was really enjoying doing. I had gotten used to a slower pace while the studio was packed away, and I liked it. I wonder if it's possible to still go slow, and still get it all done. There's only one way to find out. Trust the process, breathe, wobble, wobble, adjust...
Some things won't get done. Some will get done later. Any time we add something to our lives, other things have to scooch over and make room. We do it all the time, with new jobs, new babies, new hobbies, new friends, new loves. Letting my old friend, Beads, back in isn't really such a hard thing. And I trust that the balance will come if I can just relax and try to stay centered.
First things first--time to go put my socks on and get on with this day.